Happy Cinco de Mayo!

I don't really understand this holiday.

I should probably look it up.

I just feel like it gives me another really good excuse

to present this photo of

Zara the cat in a sombrero.

Enjoy!

Two Poems Are Better Than One

It's poetry month!

I think the only publisher who actually celebrates this month is

Random House.

I get a poem a day from them

for the month of April every year

in my e-mail.

It's a lovely thing.

Anyway, I'm not sure how prolific I will be this month,

but here are two poems

just for you:

"Two Cats"

*(Wee came up with the first two lines.

When I asked her what she does when she's sad,

she said she hugs her cats.)

and

"Dead Bird"

*(It's about the dead bird I saw this morning of all mornings.)

I'm a little rusty at writing poetry, 

so just laugh with me.

Okay, here goes:

Two Cats

Two cats are better than one

Two cats are so much fun

Two cats, paired like peas in a pod

Two cats, neither of them are named Todd

Two cats, frowning at your skeptical face

Two cats, next on The Amazing Race

Two cats hike the Appalachian Trail

Two cats will never fail

Two cats are asleep in your shoes

Two cats got into your booze

Two cats think your stupid joke is funny

Two cats fart after tasting honey

Buht, buht

Buht, buht

Buht

Two cats slide through a box

Two cats chase the fox

Two cats love, love, love fish

Two cats, they share a splish!

Two cats nap on your head

Two cats, they pretend that you're dead

Two cats are better than one

Two cats are so much fun

Dead Bird

Oh, bird.

You once took flight,

high up in the air,

morning, noon, and night.

You loved what you did,

though perhaps a little too much.

Now you're feeling

a bit out of touch.

As they saying goes:

Pimpin' aint eazy.

But just keep swimming,

just keep swimming,

and life was but a dream. 

Naw mean, bra?

Poof!

From the 2013 NYC Armory Show

Having one of those 

I wish I could just disappear

days.

On the bright side,

next week we head to Tokyo and Taipei!

Worrying Is for Wusses.

Make that sign, art guy,

so I can put it next to my

Hang in There cat poster.

Lauren the Cat

I wish I could be a cat sometimes.

Warm with fur.

Just hanging out on my back on the carpet.

Soft and a little tubby.

People miffed about why I only want my belly rubbed

when I'm ready.

Meow.

Pftt . . . pfttttt!

Raccoon tail.

Slinks to bedroom under the comforter.

Wet food.

Dry food.

Water.

Cats in hats.

Cats/dogs.

Eh.

The only shit I want to deal with is my own.

Cat in a Sombrero!

When Lisa adopted Zara last year for her birthday,

Zara was just a little kitten.

So soft and furry and curious and friendly.

Now she's just a cat in a sombrero.

Ay, chihuahua!